Introducing Atticus

Good day. Let me introduce myself. My name is Atticus and I am a solid red English cocker spaniel in the prime of my life. Before we go any further, I must make the distinction between the English and the cocker spaniels that everyone has seen (Americans), as I would be mortified if you mistook me for one of those lesser, ordinary spaniels.

We English have long, regal noses, as opposed to those little stubby up-turn noses of the Americans, and our bodies are longer, leaner and taller. We are also smarter, happier, mellower & less in-bred. And that all adds up to Superior, in my book! English cocker spaniels have been described as “the merriest of breeds”, which I think suits me quite well.

I live a bit of a double life. I’m quite intelligent and curious, with a wide array of interests in diverse subjects like politics, literature, philosophy, the stock market and religion, to name a few, but I’m a dog. This is where things get tricky & a bit complicated for me. Humans don’t understand that my mind is as sharp as the best & brightest of their breed, and since I am not able to verbally articulate my thoughts, it’s best that humans view me as an ordinary canine; dog-dumb.

Humans just love the silly playfulness and unaware nature of dogs, so I’ve found it’s best to play into that stereotype. And I’m very good at it, especially since my mind unconsciously sends me to dog-dumb quite often. It feels good to be in that headspace sometimes; not a care in the world.

So, as I wake this morning, my two very distinct poles are fighting for domination: half of me is screaming “ Wake up mama!! It’s a new day!”, while my more evolved self thinks, “maybe I’ll wait a few minutes to wake her so I can enjoy a little quiet time and check out the Bloomberg report as the markets open”. Check my stock picks or kiss mama awake.... sloppy kisses on mama’s face wins this morning.

Shrill, Baby, Shrill!

I’m very concerned about the creatures in the Gulf Coast, and the humans who’s livelihoods are threatened because of the ruptured under-sea oil well. This is a tragedy on all levels. So many species are being be harmed -- shrimp & jellyfish, crawdads & catfish, birds & reptiles....canines and humans.

I vividly remember (anxiety-provoking flashbacks, actually) the shrill cries of “drill, baby, drill”. The “shrill”, being an avid hunter (don’t even get me started on that subject), who quit her job, lost her race, went to multiple colleges to get her undergrad degree in journalism (a profession she now reviles as “lame-stream media”) and has a litter larger than my birth-mother. Mama or I scramble for the mute button the moment she’s on the telly, but I’ve heard that rally cry enough times to haunt my subconscious forever.

I am completely dumbfounded by the fact (polls?) that some people lick up this dribble (yes, that was a play on words...I was an English major). Granted, I’m just a canine with political aspirations, but I think I may have stronger qualifications to hold public office than “the shrill”. Please note: In today’s photo I am wearing the doggie version of the obligatory flag pin that candidates must wear, in order to assure the masses of our patriotism.

I can’t, in all fairness, put everything on the ex-beauty princess from Way-silly. Bo’s papa (note: I have a huge man-crush on Bo!), approved more off-shore drilling exploration just a few weeks ago. Yes, I was shocked, disillusioned & saddened (and I intuit that my bud, Bo, was feeling the same). I have confidence, though, that Bo’s papa will re-evaluate the alternatives after reviewing the devastation of the gulf.

I understand that I’m a dog, and not part of the voting public. But I have to believe that I put more thought into many of these issues than some humans. Renewable, sustainable energy seems to be a much better place to focus our attention than finite resources that carry a great risk to our planet and our well being. Why would this make sense to a dog, but not to all humans?

On an upbeat note, in regards to the oil spill, I think I have helped with reigning in some of the oil. I just had a major haircut (the dreaded “summer-cut), and I’m pretty sure I contributed to helping the cleanup effort. This is really cool, dear readers; check out this link to learn about my contribution and how you can help too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwQOD_Ir2vQ